Wednesday, April 29, 2009

NERD OUT

Because I can't find a decent place to play my word in my Scrabble game against Tim, or rather, because I've finally finished what I've been calling "the nerd pile," it's time for a book review post. Now, the following is by no means the depth and scope of all the unread books I own that could go into something called a Nerd Pile. Rather, I placed an Amazon order about a month ago and when the box arrived I realized I had bought a graphic novel, a book about Princess Leia, and a book about the history of comic books in America and that maybe I had reached a new level; I had "One-Upped" as it were.

Neuromancer
By William Gibson

This is the book I was actually reading when said box arrived, pushed it's glasses up on it nose, and started talking about physics. It perfectly fits in the category though, so I'm keeping it in the post.

Some professor at Centenary, I don't know who, assigned this book every year for one of their classes, meaning that I looked at it in the bookstore just enough times to start to think it was important. Apparently, a lot of other people thought so too, as it is the only book to have won The Hugo, The Nebula and the Philip K. Dick Awards. According to Wikipedia, it's also the book that spread the word "cyberspace" (coined by the author in 1982) throughout the culture. Don't tell me science fiction never contributed anything to society!

Single-handedly giving birth to the cyberpunk genre is no easy task, and this book is full of the kind of things you would expect from world-shaking, genre-creating, fiction. The characters are all caricatures of lots of things you'll see later on in things like The Matrix. Case, the main character, is a junkie and a loner whose nervous system has been wrecked as punishment for stealing from his employer--but he used to be the best hacker and thief that ever jacked into... wait for it... the matrix.

The rest of the cyber-misfits are there too: takes-no-shit, leather-clad, body-guard/lover; brainwashed, ex-army man sent by the unknown employer to carry out the mission; a mysterious and inbred family of wealthy nut-cases; artificial intelligences gone out of control; a lost love trapped in virtual reality; sleazy, wheedling, backroom arms dealers; a colony of true-believing Rastafari in junky space barges; even the ugly foreign bartender with all the right answers.

But it's never dull, and rarely predictable. Sometimes juvenile and ridiculously self-indulgent, yes. But on some level, what good punk culture isn't?

Watchmen
By Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons

All Nerd Snobs have this indescribable feeling when something coveted and beloved enters the popular culture. I can't remember where I read it, but I'll paraphrase one reviewer who I think put it best. "No one will ever appreciate this thing the way that you did, ten years ago, and no movie or ad or breakfast cereal will ever be good enough to represent it's utter perfection, the subtle genius rendered by its creators, but at least hot girls are finally reading it on the train."

This book is another Hugo winner (Surprise!). If you saw the movie without reading the book, you did yourself an incredible disservice, AND you put yourself through the most godawful sex scene in any movie since 8 Mile. (I liked the movie ok--there's just a natural order for things.) I'm not even going to bother telling you what it's about: if you've never read a graphic novel, and you think you don't have the patience, or you "don't like comic books" pull up your pants already and read this.

Wishful Drinking
By Carrie Fischer

"You know I saw yet another one of those Leia figurines recently at one of those comic book conventions--which yes, I go to when I'm lonely. Anyway this doll was on a turnstile. And when it got to a particular place on the turnstile, you could see up my dress, to my anatomically correct--though shaved--galaxy snatch. Well, as you can imagine, because this probably happens to you all the time, I was a bit taken aback by this, so I called George [Lucas] and I said, "You know what, man? Owning my likeness does not include owning my lagoon of mystery." Pg. 87

Yeah, she pretty much goes on and on like that for 200 pages, except she starts at her childhood with Debbie Reynolds, goes all the way through Star Wars, her marriage to Paul Simon, her electroshock therapy and into the present. Which is worth the money if you ask me.

The Ten Cent Plague: The Great Comic Book Scare and How it Changed America
By David Hajdu

Sadly, entertaining subject matter ≠ entertaining book. Ok--here's the deal. In the 1950's, people went nuts. And as a result of that the comic book industry, which was just shaping up to be the most wildly innovative, subversive and popular form of entertainment for people under the age of 30, experienced a crippling attack by biased, under-informed, overly-zealous politicians and religious types who put thousands of people out of work by whipping the masses into a frenzy and legislating a single art-form to near-death.

It sounds pretty interesting. Until you fill a book full of guys named Frank and Bill and make it sort of hard to tell them all apart or remember why they were all that important. The other major shortcoming of the book is that it is woefully lacking in pictures (there are a few, wedged in the middle). Maybe if I could see those scandalously tight tights, or the cover of the first MAD Magazine, that would help.

In the end, this book will make you smarter, and it makes you appreciate your relative freedom to read whatever you damn well please without being called a commie or thrown in jail. This is definitely a "learn from our mistakes" book more than a "look at these cool old comics" book. Maybe Tim would like it. :)

The Comics: The Complete Collection
By Brian Walker

Like I said, I found the lack of pictures before to be a drag. Considering the numerous chapters in Ten Cent Plague where thousands upon thousands of comics were burned, I figured an anthology was better than trying to find the real thing if I wanted to see what this stuff looked like.

This book is massively large (and currently on sale at Borders, Yee haw!). Not only does it include all of the major artists mentioned in The Ten Cent Plague, like Milton Caniff and Will Eisner, it's got fun old comics like Al Capp stuff, The Katzenjammer Kids and Popeye AND new old comics like Calvin and Hobbes, the Far Side, and even Ziggy (who I find totally repulsive, but whatever floats your boat).

Really I could just read this forever. But it's a helpful supplement to the other book if you're up for some learnin'.

Harry Potter (All of 'Em)
By J.K. Rowling

That's right, I finally finished them. I read the first five before I went on my trip last November, and I just finished 6 and 7 in a week-long reading frenzy. Now I kind of just want to read them all over again.

I can't even bother trying to review them. I thought everyone had spoiled the end for me (thanks SOCIETY), but both books still totally shocked me, and I cried a million times, and I keep unintentionally using words like Obliviate and Apparate in sentences around people who don't know wtf I'm talking about and I thought I was cooler than that. But I can't help it, they just pop in there like normal words.

That's the whole point though.

Good fiction should be so utterly captivating that you forget your whole life, that your true world succumbs to the one on the page in front of you and hours pass unnoticed. And when you finally surface, your emotions and thoughts should remain so entangled in what you've read that you keep thinking about what you've read until your outlook changes. Good literature should so engross you that it has the same effect on your personal character that really meeting people and doing things and living their lives would have--only without you having to have terrible trials and loss day and night, left and right.

I'm not saying I read Harry Potter and thought "well, Now I've defeated Evil, time to buy a new wand." But I'm saying that if you read Harry Potter and think it teaches children to worship the devil, your brain is broken. And maybe your heart too.

Maybe that's why science fiction and fantasy--and even Nerds--are so awesome. Because they're all about embracing what "normal" people have come to fear.

Saturday, April 25, 2009

This is the future.

"We can do anything now that scientists have invented magic."
-Marge Simpson

Monday, April 20, 2009

Hotdogs Have Ear-Sight

In fourth grade, my bestie Cheyenne and her little sister Michelle wrote this song. I still remember all of the words and it gets stuck in my head all the time. 17 years later. See if you can tell this was written by an 8 year-old and Sing Along!

Hot dogs have ear-sight
Hot dogs have ear-sight
Hot dogs have ear-sight
and there's nothing you can do about that.
FAT
Fatty-Fatty Two-by-Four, couldn't get through the bathroom door
So he did it on the floor
How is that for Fatty-Fatty Two-by-Four
FOUR
Four little doggies sittin' in a tree
One, two, three
They all go pee.
PEE
TEA
Tea tea my dollies drink tea
And Hawaiian Punch
PUNCH PUNCH
KICK KICK
Sock 'em in the nuts!
NUTS
HUTS
Fairy huts
Made of tulips and daisies
Whoopsy Daisies!
There go my undies!
and they're covered with....

Hot dogs have ear-sight
Hot dogs have ear-sight
Hot dogs have ear-sight
And there's nothing you can do about that...

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Honk Honk

Well. I'm sending my first check to Georgetown tomorrow.

Despite the knowledge that this is merely the first in a long line of checks, it fills me with an overwhelming sense of calm. OM.

What fills me with an overwhelming sense of excitement, however, is the fact that Kristin is coming this weekend. Our friend Barb (who was in Kristin's wedding with me) is moving to Iraq in about two weeks, so Kristin's coming to see her off.

What this means for me:
Kristin on my couch
Barb Party
Zoo on Saturday
Shopping at H&M with a girl
Jeopardy Drinking Game Party
Tequila Queso
Roxieritas
Homemade Salsa
Best not-quite-but-almost Earth Day ever.

Every time I talk to Kristin, she suggests something else to do that I could not possibly want to do more. Get out of my dreams and into my car.

Saturday, April 11, 2009

oh beneficent something, anything...






When I was living in the blue house, I made up one of those "necessity recipes" where you have a little of this and little of that and something totally mind-bogglingly awesome... it was this, red-wine-fresh basil-italian sausage soup.

After the first time, I made it again like three times because it was so awesome and I guess I figured I'd remember what I did because I NEVER WROTE IT DOWN. Now those three ingredients have met in my refrigerator again in a perfect storm of awesomeness and I can't remember what else goes in the pot.

Chicken stock? Tomato? Probably garlic... uhhhhh.

The last recipe written in my cookbook is Kacie's recipe for Monkey Bread, which, BTW, I didn't realize she had written there so about a month ago I frantically searched all over for a recipe and ended up using one from Food Network because I couldn't get a hold of Kacie. Exciting story, I know.

The only real news on the graduate school front is the Georgetown should cost half as much as expected because they only want me to take 2 classes a semester if I go there. Fair enough. The only problem is, I can't really strangle any information out of their financial dept. I miss Mary Sue Rix like no one's business. I would pay her to come be my life financial consultant.

Purdue said they're "very impressed by my application but waiting to find out if they have a TA for me, because they don't admit anyone without funding." So that's basically the exact opposite of the problem I have with Georgetown.

UW? Tulane? MIA.

AND--Georgetown sent me an email telling me that rather than needing to know by the 20th, they need to know my decision by the 15th. GREAT. (I replied and said, "Um.... kthx, but r u shur we cant w8?")

It's so odd how there are always things like this going on in life. There's never a day when you say "I have absolutely nothing to take care of. I'm not waiting to find out about anything. There is nothing in the universe required of me, and vice versa."

How is that possible?

If I wasn't fixating on Grad School right now, what would I be doing instead?

I think about this a lot. Like, what are all of the potential things I could be spending my brain energy on right now--but instead I happen to solely focused on this.

Where is my sausage soup?


Thursday, April 02, 2009

Good Vibrations

I love.
Good music.
Mix tapes.
Free things.
Amazon.com.
My laptop.
The interwebs.
Downloads.
Free good music download mixtapes from the interwebs on amazon.com
Here.

Gold Teeth

About two weeks ago, two things happened on the same day that were oddly ambiguous in a very meaningful way.

1. I got an email from Georgetown telling me that I had been "recommended" for admission to their graduate program, which at the time was almost more nerve wracking than exciting but in case you don't know I'll spare you the suspense and just tell you that (it's confirmed) I got in.

~and~

2. I got a letter from CU in Boulder saying that I was not admitted. Period. No suspense there. Thank you for your time and money.

The reason that these two events are more ambiguous than they seem, and not as outwardly "good" and "evil" as they appear is deep and wide.

First things first: I didn't really want to go to CU as a school. But I did want to go to CU, and be on the campus that I love, and be near my family, and root for MY football team for once. CU didn't really offer the kind of program I wanted and I don't really agree with the school's politics--but I could have paid in-state tuition, and I know the campus so well it's like already being home. And I just really, really, really miss Colorado. I miss my family everyday. I can't say for sure if I would have gone to CU just to be near them, but I would have liked to have the option.

Now: Georgetown. Georgetown is the kind of degree I want to hang on my wall. My God. However there are two looming issues. 1.) Tuition is over $1500 per credit hour (*gasp*choke*gag*) and I get the impression I'm going to have to wring any financial aid information out of them and 2.) I don't want to live in DC. Still. Anymore. Ever. At all. Of course, staying here means I get to stay with Tim while he PMFs and undertakes his metamorphosis into bureaucracy (God, I hope not) and then we can keep playing house until it's time for me to get my PhD or he takes a job in Zanzibar.

But is it worth it???

Meanwhile, I still haven't heard from THREE other schools but I have to inform Georgetown of my intent to matriculate (+$200) by April 20.

Essentially, the fate of the next two years (at very least) of my life lies in the next 2-3 weeks. Every day I check the mail hoping that there will be some sort of answer. I'm not sure what form I'm expecting it to take. Another acceptance or rejection letter (or three). A check for $100K. A letter from someone in college asking me to be the first mate on their yacht.

I'm on the verge of taking up augury, divination, and general superstition in order to find an answer... all of this because I'd rather pay someone to tell me what books to read than go to work everyday. Maybe that in and of itself should be a sign.