A Horse Called Tub

Alright. It's obviously been much too long.

Here are three book reviews.

The Sisters Brothers
By Patrick deWitt

This book was a finalist for the Man Booker prize, and kept popping up on those "Best books of 2011" or "Best of the Month" type lists, but I was reluctant to read it because, well, it looked like a cheesy, westerny, hit-man novel.  The simple synopsis is sort of lame: two famous hit men, the Sisters brothers embark on what could be their last hit. Involved are: gold, women and bourbon, blah blah blah. The original cover (in red) didn't help--sorry, I judge. I judge a lot.

Then I spied the paperback in the store with the new cover (in blue), succumbed to the pressure, and picked it up and read the first paragraph:

I was sitting outside the Commodore's mansion, waiting for my brother Charlie to come out with news of the job. It was threatening to snow and I was cold and for want of something to do I studied Charlie's new horse, Nimble. My new horse was called Tub. We did not believe in naming horses but they were given to us as partial payment for the last job with the names intact, so that was that. Our unnamed previous horses had been immolated, so it was not as though we did not need these new ones but I felt we should have been given money to purchase horses of our own choosing, horses without histories and habits and names they expected to be addressed by.

This paragraph is a small-scale example of the odd, violent, and somehow wryly humorous cosmos inhabited by the narrator. In my mind, the book played out like a Cohen-brothers film. It's rather like True Grit only more surreal and funnier. Surreal. Funny. Violent. Those are your key words here. And maybe beautiful, because the writing sort of rolls through your mind. Also maybe dream-like. Basically, the moment I put the book down, I wanted to turn back to page one and start reading it all over again, which never happens. I'm not sure what genre this book fits in, only that I love it with all my heart.

I would recommend this book to: I honestly don't know. Someone looking for something different. If you liked The Prestige, you will love this book.

The Shining
By Stephen King

I said I was reading this and my friend Mike said, "Is that why you get a Masters in English? So you can read Stephen King?" Duh.  This is why Stephen King is awesome. His books are generally seen as gory fluff, but he's so frigging smart. There are authors that pop up every once in a while that seem to be able to take everything in like a vacuum: pop culture, psychology, mythology, history, literature, and then synthesize it into a beautiful little package that manipulates the crap out of your emotions.  J.k. Rowling is the master of this. Stephen King is a bajillionaire because of it.

I'm fairly certain that unless you live in a closet you know what The Shining is about. It's worth reading the book because, although Stanley Kubrick's version of the film is good, there are other things going on in the book that got totally lost. I dare you to keep a tally of how many bizarre forms of isolation and possession are going on in this book at the same time... And then get drunk and hang out in your house by yourself for a night.

Bonus: it's fun to read about navigating an airport in 80's. Hahahaha, you just showed up, bought a ticket, got on a plane... and then smoked on the plane? Unbelievable.

I recommend this book to: Anyone who's coming out for the wedding. It will be fun to read it and then stay in a little mountain hotel in the middle of nowhere, right? Same goes for The Stand. You'll really enjoy driving through those tunnels.

Role Models
By John Waters (audio book)

My affinity for John Waters is a little weird. I adore him. I will go to great lengths to hear him speak and I would pretty much stalk him in Baltimore given the chance, but I'm kind of meh about his films. I like them but they don't really blow my skirt up.

That being said, I probably enjoyed this book more than someone who is really into his films because he doesn't talk about them much. Instead, he talks about the people and types of people he admires, as well as art, fashion and books--all in that gloriously subversive way he has. Tennessee Williams gets a chapter, of course, as does Little Richard. There are stellar chapters in the book, and then there were one or two chapters that I was really rather bored by.  The benefit of the audio book is that Waters' voice is so iconic. The downside is that if you find yourself less-than-interested in the outsider porn scene, it's harder to skim through.

Waters' chapters on Leslie Van Houten, of Manson Family fame, and the chapter where he describes what he would require if he were a cult leader are pure gold. They're why I find him endearing. He's both open-minded, accepting and kind, and also outrageous, wicked, and a little insane. He's my role model.


I would recommend this book to: Jared, Blake, and Parham: the three closest things I have to my own personal John Waters.