This is the most exhausted I have ever felt in my life. I have gotten myself into too many things: four jobs (20 hours a week), 18 hours of class, honors, this French book, a gender conference (if I ever hear back from them), Kristin's wedding (which isn't time-consuming yet, but it will be, in a good way).I am overwhelmed. But now that I'm in it, I have to finish it, all of it, to the best of my ability.
I really, honestly miss listening to music and gluing bits of paper to other bits of paper, making origami and throwing it away, organizing photographs, having paint under my fingernails, reading for fun and without a deadline, watching movies, cooking things I don't need to eat in order to survive, sending postcards to people, writing thoughtful emails... the list goes on. I haven't written in my journal more than 20 times in the past two years, I used to write every day, back when I was a sane person.
Anyway, I'm tired. I'm ready to graduate so that I can stop living for a product at 100%, 100% of the time. I probably won't write again for a couple of weeks, not because I don't have anything to say, but because I feel a tangible guilt when I do something that's not assigned to me or making money.
Which I hate.
I miss you like I missed you when I was here:
I miss you too, like when I missed you too, like I miss me, when I missed me, too. Oh, that this too too sullied chocolate would melt, thaw, resolve itself into a... too!
ReplyDeleteA... too!
ReplyDeleteWell, gesundheit!
Hey Kiddo, Steve Peters once told me- "you have ideas, and I have ideas, and we use some of them and some we don't..."
ReplyDeleteThis has nothing to do with you being busy, but just remember- as long as it sounds important, it is important, and when you get done being busy, you will have time to relax and forget about...
You probably don't have time to read this.
Love,
Dadwa.
Bitchin' slide...
ReplyDelete